When stress comes in double blows, my chest feels stifled and my heart races every now and then.

I shall not talk about JJ and Work.

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I shall talk about silly things and amuse myself with changing colours.

Now, why do guys NOT like me?

Mr R said, "Of cos lah, you are not pretty. I would like Miss A and Miss B, but not you." I got mad at him. STood up abruptly from my seat, dropped all my stuff on the ground, said,"I'm going to get water," and walked off in a huff. I think I heard them say,"TAke water for me hor!"I paced inside Coffee Bean for a while and decided not to lose my cool any further, took water for them. When i returned to them, Mr R said,"See I told ya, she's not the petty kind." Yea right. Until today, I still remember vividly what he said that day.

Reason #1 -- All right, so I don't have the looks.

At Borders, I was alone reading a book on the secret sex scene in Singapore. The two guys came over and peeped at what I am reading. I said,"Very easy job, very good money, I also want to do." Mr B knocked my head,"I think you will have problem finding business," pointed to the woman on the cover and continued, "Look at her figure and look at yours." "OK lah, ok lah.." I walked off. The two guys roared with laughter behind me.

Reason #2 -- I don't have the figure either.

Later on the escalator, I exclaimed out of the blue, "But those Fili****s and Th**s also don't have the figure what. They are worse than me in fact! Small boobs, big tummy, short frame, not pretty..."Mr B retorted, "But they have SKILLS. You don't have." I kept quiet, ya, I don't have skills, but how does he know whether I have the skills. It's wiser to keep quiet.

Reason #3 -- I don't have the skills to provide more happiness n satisfaction.

On another occasion in school in the seminar room. I was reading something. Mr E walked over and asked if he can borrow my textbook beside me. Without lifting my head to look at him once, I said,"Ok." AFter a while, Mr E came back with the book,"Thanks for the book. I'm E****, what's your name?" Still keeping my head down,"DOESN'T MATTER." He got a shock, put down the book and walked away.

Others have commented that I am too aloof, too quiet, too "black face" and just not approachable.

Reason #4 -- I am not approachable.Yea, I don't look that friendly and so look unapproachable, that people never get to know me better.

Mr A and Mr D said, "How to like you? Even like you also don't dare to tell you. You have always been attached ever since we first know you."

Ok mah.. Only at 3rd boyfriend. Is that a lot? But i have been constantly attached since JC year1 till now. About 7 years. There have been 2 little gaps in between and there were guys that wanted to get together with me, but they were all weird guys. Don't tell me only the super pretty ones get all the eligible guys and I only DESERVE a few not so good ones?

Reason #5 -- I have been seldom Single and Available.

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Why guys don't like me huh? I'm quite a nice girlfriend mah. Ask my 1st and current bf. :) Skip the bastard in between though.